Just had to include the transcript of Chris Matthews' first of many discussions of Barack Obama's bowling score at an alley in Altoona back in late March. It's all completely inane, hilarious-but-pathetic reading, but for those of you with busy schedules I've bolded some of the more egregious howlers.
The cast: Hardball host Chris Matthews, Newsweek reporter Howard Fineman, Congressional Quarterly reporter Jonathan Allen, and MSNBC political analyst Michelle Bernard (who, it helps to know when reading this abysmal exchange, is African-American).
MATTHEWS: We‘re back with the round table for more of the politics fix. Howard, I want to ask you about bowling today. I want to ask you about bowling.
FINEMAN: Just because I‘m from Pittsburgh.
MATTHEWS: No, no, no. It‘s so interesting. Here‘s a guy trying to break into the white ethnic voting crowd, so he goes and plays the sport most associated I think with regular folks in the big cities and small towns. You and I grew up doing a little bowling. We know what a pathetic score is. Neither of us have ever done a 37, I think it‘s fair to say.
FINEMAN: To fair to Barack, it was over seven frames. OK. But that still isn‘t much. I mean, he definitely needs some bowling less sense [sic]. He should do what we used to do in Pittsburgh, all night bowling for a dollar, really work on your game. I think he did get Frank O‘Harris [sic] and he did get Jerome Bettis, the Bus, to endorse him. He‘s traveling around on the bus with the Bus.
If you can‘t do something like that, you shouldn‘t do it. He should have stuck to shooting hoops, which he‘s very, very good at, by the way, which translates racially too, especially during the NCAA basketball tournament. Don‘t do something you‘ve never tried before in front of a national television audience.
MATTHEWS: Michelle, this gets very ethnic, but the fact that he‘s good at basketball doesn‘t surprise everybody. The fact that he‘s terrible at bowling makes you wonder.
BERNARD: It doesn‘t surprise anybody black, I can tell you that.
MATTHEWS: Is black—I guess everybody bowls.
FINEMAN: This is killing him, Chris. Don‘t show it over and over again.
MATTHEWS: This is a killer. Look at this killer. It isn‘t the most macho form there.
FINEMAN: He can‘t challenge Hillary. I think he doesn‘t dare challenge Hillary, because Hillary‘s from Chicago. She might actually be able to get over triple digits.
MATTHEWS: I‘m waiting to see if Hillary challenges him to a bowling match. It might be a thrilling—you know what, what would get a higher poll, a higher rating do you think, Jonathan, a higher television rating, a bowling match between Hillary and Barack or another debate?
ALLEN: The bowling match absolutely would, because everybody would be watching to see when they went in the gutter.
FINEMAN: You got to do HARDBALL bowling, Chris. You got to do it.
BERNARD: He gave a good response today when he was talking about his failures as a bowler. I think he probably picked up some points from people who felt sorry for him who didn‘t know what he was doing.